Throwing it all away

Monday, July 9, 2012

Many of you know I have been really down and out this 2012.  I spent the first few months deathly ill, and then then rest under all unnecessary stress.

I am out of it.  I am out of my zone. I sit here, and stare at the computer screen, and forget what I was just thinking about.

I have been trying not to take it so personal. A thankless job if you ask me. Rick and I spent 22 years sacrificing our teen years, and twenties and thirties doing the right things, and yet, when it all comes down to it, life is about us now.

We are blessed to have each other, and to plan now the "next 40 years"...

I could call out the many people that threw away the friendships and family for their own selfish reasons, but why bother?  Let them realize what they lost later.

Before I was 18, I read constantly. I worked out, I swam like it was no tomorrow.  I lived on my ten speed bicycle.  I traded all of that at an early age for a cubicle to support my house and family. Now it's Rick and my time now. Finish off the mortgage, plan trips, buy matching Camaros. All these things are just things though.  Will chasing my 20s and 30s that I lost to sacrifice, make me feel any better?  Probably not.

At 40 years old, Rick and I are going to do some serious upgrades on the house. Plan our future, our retirement one day. Our long awaited honeymoon.

People will throw you away when they have no more use for you.  That is their right. It's up to you to take care of you at that point. 

Sharing light with Kimmy. Striving to create a path between the present course of events and a new course; leading to new outcomes.

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7 comments:

Kim said... 10 July, 2012 17:31

I could have almost written the same thing. I've been getting no sleep lately due to a number of things and it just makes me feel worse. Hope it gets better for you! HUGS!

Marms said... 11 July, 2012 00:10

Thinking lots of things is difficult. That's what gives me sleepless nights sometimes. Take it easy my friend. Don't stress yourself on people who are not worth of your time.

God bless!

Marms

Janet Gardner said... 14 July, 2012 21:58

I know some of what your going through. I also sacrificed for my kids at a young age. Growing up, no one handed me a thing. With a sick mother and a stressed out Father, there were things I needed guidance on and never got. Yet I instinctively knew what I should do, and how I should treat others. So you take what you've learned and teach with words and by example, and that's all you can do. The rest is up to them. Focus on you and Rick now the best you can. You've earned it,and you deserve it! Transitions are always hard, but transition we must.
Love ya,
Janet :)

Joyce Lansky said... 14 July, 2012 23:00

It's great if you are able to take time for yourselves. With this economy, we feel like we work harder for less.

http://joycelansky.blogspot.com

Catherine said... 16 July, 2012 10:03

Sometimes it seems that people are so shallow and hurtful. I don't know how people don't realize how much they hurt others.
I empathize with what you are going through.
I will keep you in my prayers. I hope you are feeling better. Blessings dearest. Catherine

Anonymous said... 19 July, 2012 08:06

Good spirited message....Well said......keep on movin on Faith..........miss ya from afar.....

Anonymous said... 19 July, 2012 08:07

um THE ICON...lol..said the previous message.

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