Saturday, March 26, 2011
Trigger for a Transformation
This was to the point of becoming almost unbearable. One night I woke up in the middle of the night, as I had many times before, in a state of even more intense dread and fear.
The mind had lots of reasons why I was feeling fearful, and yet that state was continuous no matter what my external situation was. It became so unbearable that suddenly the thought occurred to me, "I cannot live with myself any longer."
That thought was the trigger for a transformation.
The thought kept repeating itself many times in my head and then suddenly there was a stepping back from the thought and a looking at the thought. I asked, "Who is the 'I' and who is the self that I cannot live with?"
An excerpt from Ekhardt Tolle's The Power Of Now.
This was an important realization for me. How can one person "hate" oneself? Must be two separate consciousness in order to "hate."
lol.. and I always thought it was the Gemini dual personalities.
One more share. I read this last week.
"I am Human so desires will always come. If enlightenment is in my cards, it’s not now, so those desires are okay and happening for a reason, and they teach me more each day.
As a Being, I can open myself and go deep into esoteric mystical studies, have some very dynamic numinous experiences (which ultimately are purely subjective and cannot be explained) that also teach me more about who I am.
Grounding myself in both, walking a middle path between the two allows me to enjoy the fullness of this life, however long it may be. It also prepares me to journey further into Spirit, a journey that will never end for expansion is not limited to a set-period of time, expansion is infinite."
Inner struggles will not stop once you find your "Spiritual Path." Being aware is more acknowledging that you will always be human. How you choose to ground and balance yourself is the key to acceptance.
Food for enlightenment and thought!
Sharing light with Kimmy. Striving to create a path between the present course of events and a new course; leading to new outcomes.