Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Oh Darlin - What makes a best friend
I miss her.
I never had to worry about her judging me, nor did I judge her. We were straight-forward with each other. She never looked at my hair or nails and told me I should go to the salon. Bobbi understood that I worked hard, and did what I could in the time I had. Although she did not work full time, she never threw it in my face that I had to work on Presidents Day. She got me.
I worshiped her confidence and talent. Deep down, she was different than anyone I met. She was afraid, and then she wasn't. My husband adored her. She was real. She had her demons like the rest of us, but didn't have to run a person down to make herself feel better.
We never really had a falling out. Lives just went different directions. I had two jobs, and I was drinking whenever I wasn't working. I was a mess, and my hermit life began. I shut everyone out, and drank most nights alone, at home, till I passed out.
I didn't even know she died.
If you thought my drinking was bad before, I finished double after I heard the news. I reached out to Dean, her ex-husband.. and it was wonderful. We talked on the phone, and online, and we both just lived on the her good memories.
Tyler, her son posted a picture of himself and his momma. I couldn't look for a second without crying.
I have only been sober for just over a year, by my own choice, and I am beginning to feel, once again.
I can miss her every day, and remember what I once had. A best friend.. whom I didn't judge, and whom didn't judge me.
Every other friend I have had before or since hasn't been the same.
I cherish her in my heart.. today and forever.
I tried to make a dedication Facebook page for her, but can't get past the first few minutes. I will try again soon.
Sharing light with Kimmy. Striving to create a path between the present course of events and a new course; leading to new outcomes.