It is greater to control the desires arising in your mind rather than controlling the desires available in front of you.
yes...I know. I am struggling with this. A dirty mind is a horrible thing to waste.
The way you expect others not to harm, do not think of harming others
And this is what changed me. I do not want to hurt the ones I love. Period. I have to be able to control my fantasy world. Which is difficult since fantasy life has been more active than my real one.